My Name is Spud.

So in my line of work you hear a lot of things but when it comes with the thickest southern accent it only makes it funnier.


Me: thank you for calling the Inn.How can I help you?


Caller:Hello, my name is Spud. Me and my lady friend are planning to come to your neck of the woods and we would like to know what is going on in your bar.


Me: I do apologize but I am not in the hotel directly.


Caller: You sound northern. You aren't in New Orleans are you?


Me: No. I am in Washington.


Caller: How is our country's capital?


Me: Sorry, I am in Washington state.


Caller: Oh, how is the rain?


Me: It's OK. I am on the dry side of the state toward Idaho.


Caller: Oh Bless you. Well me and my lady friend thank you.

A Small Event

So this story is only going to be understood in my home town. Everyone who lives locally understands when I say that Hoopfest is the biggest pain in the ass that only happens for one weekend in the Summer.



This event is so massive that ESPN will come out along with NBA scouts, college scouts, and not to mention this event is a living commercial for Nike. It's one of my favorite weekends because of where I work. I get to see all the young male basketballs players check in, play ball in the streets on my lunch break, and then get to see then with out their shirts on in the pool.



This call was in the first year that I was working there and already I was tried of it by March. The hotel where I worked was booked by August of the year before but it never fails how entertaining people can be when they try to plan on the last minute or they don't know what is going on.



Me: Thank you for the calling the Inn. How can I help you?



Caller: My son is coming in for a basketball tournament and he needs a room.



Me: OK. I can look into that for you. What date will your son be arriving?



Caller: The last weekend of June

* I knew where this was going before it even got off the ground. Can we say Crash and burn?

Me: OK. What is the team or group name?



Caller: The group is called Hoopfest.

* Really? This is going to be awkward.

Me: Ok.... Is there another group name it could be under?



Caller No, Why?

* This can only one of two ways. Either she will expect that she was given wrong information and pray to the heaven for a parking spot to open to pitch a tent or this is going to a sup call.
* I love sup calls because 95% of the time people call in the fault is not on us if there is something wrong.
* Do yourself a huge favor, if you call in make sure you what you are doing or else you will be story in a bar, blog, comedy skit on Youtube. Yes, it's happened.

Me: I do apologize but the Hotel is booked because of Hoopfest weekend.



Caller: I don't understand. How can a whole city shut down for one basketball tournament?



Me: I hate to ask this but have you heard of Hoopfest?



Caller: No.



Me:Well, Hoopfest is the largest 3 on 3 basketball tournament in the world.



Caller: Really?



Me: The reason why the whole city shuts down is because the games are played in downtown. You can't get in or out of downtown with out running into a basketball player.

* Awkward silence

Caller: Can you hold for a moment?



Me: Sure.

* Caller puts the phone down, not on hold.

Caller: Todd!



Todd: What?



Caller: Do you know how big this event is?



Todd: No.



Caller: Well, let me educate you. This City huts down and the whole city shuts down. So the only way you are going to stay is if you sleep in the street with the hookers and the drug dealers.

* Caller hangs up.

No ending needed.

Don't piss off the help

When people call me thinking that they are doing me a favor, it bugs me. Just becasue you may have a better job than me does not mean that you have the right to call in and give me attitude because you never know what will happen to you.



Me: Thank you for call The Inn in Tri-cities. How can I help you?



Caller: I need to make a reservation for the Pasco location.



Me: I can help you with that. What date will you be arriving?



Caller: Tonight, why else would I be calling you.



Awesome, one of these guys.I give him the rate and how much it would be with tax. I hate when these people call in.



Caller: Hey, I get that you have to go through this info but I have been to your hotel, I know what it has, I know what my rate is, and all I want is a room. Can we hurry this up?



Me: Sure., I will need to book with a credit card number.



Caller: Use the one on file.



Me: For your security we do not have the card on file.



Caller: Can you just hold it until i get there I am driving?



Me: I am sorry but I can't just hold it.



Caller: (even more angry then he was before) fine, if I get into a car accident I am going to sue you and the hotel's ass.



Me: Sir, how close are to the hotel?



Caller: Two miles. why?



Me: Because if you are in Washington state, it is illegal to be on the phone and driving at the same time, so you would be found at fault.



Enter awkward silence here.....



Let just say he was nice for the rest of call and I made the sale but let this be a lesson to anyone who calls in, if you are in a bad mood don't call anyone or speak to anyone. Sometimes if you give us shit, we will pile on you ten fold.



Have a nice day

FW: Blog: Chicken soup for the Cubicle soul.

> This is a tribute to anyone that has sat in a small cubicle for work. We are the back bone for great movies such as Office Space and back in the flick Wokring Girl.
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> I was introduce to the world of a call center when I was a young mother of two needing a better job then Opinion Services at the mall. It was one of those job that was there and I needed to get out and I knew exactly when.
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> When your boss takes you to a "nice bar" be cautious.
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> The rainbow room is a bar that is more like a mortuary for strippers on the age of retirement. I have been to nice strip bars in LA that were clean, this place you didnt feel like you needed a std treatment when you sit down. The room the throw up of the 70s with the smell of expired old spice. I couldn't breathe it was too toxic.
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> My boss and other co workers go to the bar and start ordering drinks that I was leary off. I have never heard of anything called velvet tequilla and after I had I wanted to do with it again. To me drinking is like hitting on a someone, make sure you are smooth like good vodka or whiskey, don't be misleading and leave a bad after taste like velvet rose tequilla.
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> We all sat down watching the "strippers" having a good time when all of a sudden it happened. There was a nine month pregnant lady waxing a pole. OH HELL NO!!! I am done.
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> As I am walking out of the bar heading to my car a co-worker came up to me.
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> Co-worker: What's the matter is this to "sinful for you"?
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> Me: No, this is lacking the quality that I am used to. I like the strippers to have goals other than money to pay for their teeth and paying back their pimp for a bad day.
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> The co-worker had nothing to say and went back into the bar.
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> I drove home and that's wehn I decided that I need another line of work and something that doesn't require me to spend time with my boss out side of work.
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> About two weeks later I was hired at a call center. It was starnge going into the building becasue it used to be the mall I went to as a child. One of my mother's favorite memories of me was lip syncing to Bruce Springstien in the JC Penny window in that building. The main floor didn't look like anything in my childhood and the smell was something of an old gym.
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> I sit down at my desk and get a little excited because the guy I was next was cute but so not worth it. His name was the same as my ex, just as short as my ax, and the same birthday as my ex. RED FLAGS!
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> I look over the partitian and I can only dicribe asa something close to a national geographic documentary on Wild Monkeys. There was a rather large man sitting at a desk arguing with someone, and I mean arguing. Other people were sitting aroung him like is was a wild dingo fight. The voice got louder, the people got closer and then: BINGO SUP CALL!
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> The larger man got up from his desk held his head set. I didn't understand because he looked happy, like he meant for it to happen and then he collected five bucks from one of his spectators.
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> I was told the other side was a satelite company that was disbanded. Disbanded, so they turn on eachother like fight club?
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> This had to be better than my last job.

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